Sometimes, despite our best efforts, we have to interact with people who “steal” our energy.
Whether unintentional or intentional, these energy vampires have the power to change your mood. That is, if you’re an empath. Because our sensitivities higher than some, one downside is that we accidently pick up unwanted “feelings.”
All of the sudden we feel anxious or sad and we don’t know why.
While it’s always important to seek mental health advice when appropriate, another way you can shield yourself is by using crystal.
In this post, we’re discussing why empaths need protection and the best empath protection stones to use on the daily.
What is Empathy?
Empathy is the ability to feel what someone else does. This shouldn’t be confused with sympathy, which means to feel bad about someone’s situation.
If you’re still confused by the difference, consider his scenario: Your friend’s mother dies. If you have sympathy, you understand the situation and you feel bad about what she’s going through. If you have empathy, you actually feel sad too. You may momentarily become depressed alongside her. This is what allows you to understand someone’s pain: Empathy and compassion. Most people have some level of empathy and are able to use it in certain situations.
However, having empathy is different from being an empath. While you can exercise empathy during a conversation, empaths don’t really have a choice. Feeling empathy is so natural to them that they seemingly can’t turn it “off.” Even when they don’t mean to, they pick up on people’s emotions, sometimes leading them to feel badly without “reason.”
What is an Empath?
The term “empath” was coined by Dr. Judith Orloff, who has written several books on the subject.
Empathic people are highly tuned into their own emotions and the emotions of those around them. Whether good or bad, they feel everything, often to extremes. Empaths “absorb” other people’s energy, both emotionally and physically. So, they may randomly feel sad or have a neck ache and not know why. In essence, they’re highly sensitive people and they feel deeply.
If you’re an empath, you can probably relate to being giving (sometimes too giving) and people probably tell you you’re a good listener. While empaths are a nurturing bunch, they can be easily hurt, leading to criticisms such as being “too sensitive.” While many tend to be introverted and would rather stay at home than go dancing, they can also be extraverted. However, extraverted empaths may prefer less time at a party.
Empaths are also highly connected to intuition. Intuition can be thought of as your “gut feeling” or inner knowing. However, we can also look at it in a different, more “scientific” way. Having good intuition is related to body language and reading people accurately. Empaths tend to have their senses heightened in other ways too. For example, they may smell things more strongly than others. Or, noise may hurt their ears while their friends enjoy it.
Are Empaths Even Real?
Are empaths recognized by science? Sort of. If you go to a psychotherapist and mention you’re an empath, they may know exactly what you mean and teach you tools to deal with it. However, others may say that’s not a DSM-5 condition and explain it way with mere feelings of empathy.
There is research to back up the fact that empaths exist though, even if it’s not a “condition” to be “cured.” For one, mirror neurons allow us to understand other’s emotions by filtering them through our own emotions. Other research proposes the idea of “emotional contagion.” This is the theory that when people match their attitudes, belief and speech, they also match their emotions, even if they don’t know they’re doing it.
But does that actually prove empaths exist? While many people can report to being empaths, it doesn’t necessarily mean they exist. After all, there’s people out there that claim to be actual vampires and can only suck blood to live. Self-reporting those (likely delusions) doesn’t mean real vampires exist.
Luckily, there’s actual data to point toward the unbiased view that empaths could exist.
More recent research shows that about 1% to 2% of the population report being an empath. Studies also suggest these individuals have “mirror-touch synaesthesia.” An example of this would be seeing someone’s face touched, and feeling it on your own face.
There’s also mirror-pain synaesthesia, which researchers say is far more common—about 30% of people experience this. The example given in the article is probably relatable to many: you see someone itching and you too begin to itch.
Although mirror-pain synaesthesia is experienced by many, empaths (1-2%) also have mirror-touch synaesthesia.
Listen to this interesting empath experiment they did: They stopped people on the street to fill out a questionnaire. They tapped the volunteer on one side of their cheek while they watched someone else being tapped on the opposite side of the cheek. Empaths are more likely to believe they’re actually being tapped on both sides of the cheek. That’s because it’s harder for them to focus on what they’re actually feeling, mixing it up with the other person. Even if they know, they make more mistakes and are slower to answer.
Even with evidence behind it, it’s possible that some people are falsely labeling themselves as empaths. In recent years, people are delving more into occult and new age topics such as psychic abilities, astrology, numerology and witchcraft. With that, they may stumble upon the term “empath” and claim to be one because they identify with other intuitive topics. However, not everyone who is spiritual or has grown their intuition is an empath. If you’re a “certifiable” empath, you can probably relate to this feeling as a child. Although being an empath has a lot of positive aspects, you may be more in touch with the negative ones, since living out that experience can be isolating until you learn to “handle” it.
“Empath” is not a new experience, but it is a relatively new term. And, with that, means that science still hasn’t caught up. Although there’s research to suggest how empaths work, a lot more work needs to be done to understand the whole picture.
What are Empath Protection Stones? Are They Needed?
Why do empaths need protection stones? Sure, they feel stronger than others, but do they really need extra “magical” stones? Whether you believe in a crystal’s powers to protect is up to you (as long as you’re not using it as a substitute for medical advice). But, there are valid reasons an empath seeks extra protection. Namely, they need to shield themselves from narcissists and energy vampires.
Narcissists and Empaths
If you’ve read about empaths before, you’ve probably also come across the term “narcissist.” Unlike the term empath, narcissists are recognized by psychology under the condition “Narcissistic personality disorder.” People with this disorder have an inflated sense of importance, a need for attention and they lack empathy for others. If that sounds like the opposite of an empath, you’re right! That’s exactly why empaths need to be careful about meeting narcissists. It’s important to note though that although the word “narcissist” is thrown around these days, it’s an actual disorder. It may be helpful to think of narcissism as a spectrum. While someone can have narcissistic traits or display that in certain scenarios, they may not be diagnosed with the disorder unless they score on the higher end of the spectrum.
Even though narcissists can suck up empath’s energy, they are, at first, seemingly magnetized to each other. In fact, if you are an empath, you’ve probably been in a relationship with a narcissist or someone with narcissistic traits. In the age old “opposites attract” idea, empaths may be attracted to the narcissist’s confidence and can be swept up in their compliments. Narcissists benefit from empaths too: They get a shoulder to lean on, unconditional love and since empaths typically put up with a lot, narcissists can get away with a lot.
While the beginning of a relationship or friendship between an empath and a narcissist may be filled with chemistry, it usually starts having trouble early on. When this happens and the empath gets the courage to “speak up,” they may be gaslit by their partner or friend. Since this can be a vicious cycle difficult to leave, it’s best if you can avoid it altogether. This could be one reason to wear or carry empath protection stones.
Empaths and Energy Vampires
Another reason that you may be looking up the best crystals for empaths is because you want to shield yourself from “energy vampires.”
“Energy vampires” was another coin termed by Dr. Judith Orloff. Just as the name suggests, these people suck your energy away. Sometimes, this is intentional. For example, a family member who makes frequent comments to put your down and keep you compliant. But, even “nice” and “normal” people can be energy vampires if they unintentionally take your energy. A good example is a friend who constantly complains about her relationship; she doesn’t even know it bothers you, but you feel fatigued afterward.
Energy vampires can be narcissists, but the term is usually reserved for people who fall outside this abrasive category. Although some people may disagree with me, energy vampires aren’t necessarily bad people. As stated, some, if not most, don’t even know what they’re doing to others. Of course, this isn’t an excuse for their behavior. But I’m not here for people trying to villainize vampires as a whole. After all, we’ve probably all been energy vampires. Yes, even us empaths. We’ve probably been in intense situations where we’ve accidentally off-loaded our stress onto others. We may have been able to correct ourselves quickly, while others make a habit of “leaching” off other’s energies.
Still, regardless of vampires’ intentions, it’s something empaths need to protect themselves against. If they don’t, they are giving away their energy and will be left for little for themselves.
13 Best Crystals for Empaths
Before we jump into the best crystals for empaths, we want to put a big disclaimer out there that stones do not replace professional help. If you have trouble saying “no” to an energy vampire, a therapist will probably help you more than a crystal. If you are trying to protect yourself from a physically abusive narcissist, a domestic abuse organization, rather than stones, should be your first point of contact.
With that out of the way, crystals can be a good and fun way to help protect yourself. Many people believe that since they’re so old and from the earth, they can be “programmed” to hold certain helping energies. Since every crystal has a different meaning, some are more appropriate than others for protection. Even if you don’t believe in that, even if stones are just a placebo, if they work, they work. If they help remind you of your inherent power and you enjoy them, there’s no harm.
Let’s jump into the best crystals for empaths.
Color: Shiny metallic/silver or black
When I think of warding off negative energies, the first stone that comes to mind is hematite. Probably because it’s one of the first I learned about years and years ago. But it also has a shiny surface to it that seems to be a metaphor for how the stone works: A mirror-like quality that reflects back the bad. And that’s exactly how it should work too.
It’s also a great stone for grounding. When you’re overwhelmed by your physical surroundings or your emotional turmoil, hematite can help you reconnect and re-centre.
#2 Black Tourmaline
For empaths: Black tourmaline is known to be a generalized stone for protection against negative energy. Whether you’re feeling less grounded than usual or feel your spirit depleting, it could be because of negative energies around you that you aren’t aware of. Black tourmaline can help you reset and clear your energy field.
Chakra: Crown, Third-Eye
If you know that amethyst is tied to the crown and third-eye chakra, you can probably guess it’s a spiritual-orientated stone. It can give you a greater sense of connection with its high vibration. It can be helpful in cleansing the aura as to “neutralize” outside energies. That way, they’ll have a lesser impact.
Another benefit is that since this stone is connected to intuition, it can help you know who to trust and who to stay away from. Although you may already have a good sense, it can help you more easily pick out energy vampires and narcissists.
Since many empaths also delve into the spiritual realms, amethyst is said to help with that as well.
#4 Smokey Quartz
Color: Grey, Brown
Think of the color of Smokey quartz as a symbol: As it absorbs your negative energy, the crystal becomes Smokey but you become more clear. Of course, that’s not the scientific reason behind the color of the stone, but it’s a fun protection technique to envision.
Smokey quartz is great for absorbing negative energies and helping to ground you when you feel unbalanced. Since it’s a root chakra stone, it encourages you to reconnect with yourself and the earth, feeling protected once again.
Chakra: Heart, Throat
Green symbolizes a few things, one of them can be power. And with that symbolism, you can take your internal power back with malachite, helping you decipher between what’s your own and what is others. It can also help you balance out your power, helping you decide how much energy should be used for compassion and how much should be used for self-protection.
Since green also is the heart chakra, it can help restore your loving heart and free it from the emotional ties it’s picked up.
Chakra: Solar Plexus
Although some use citrine for protection, it’s more commonly known as the “warm and sunny” stone. With that image, it helps conjure up feelings of happiness and warmth and positivity. Although this may not directly sound like protection, here’s the twist: It may help balance out negative energies. When a less-than-ideal vibe comes knocking at your aura, citrine can turn it off with its warmth and brightness. Besides the balancing abilities, it can help us feel happier: Something that many empaths need!
#7 Lapis Lazuli
Lapis Lazuli is a good stone known for its ability to protect you and/or repair holes in your auric field.
Since it’s blue, it can represent the throat chakra, which is all about communication. That means it can pick up where intuition left off (although it can help with intuition too). When you have a bad “vibe” from someone, this empath stone can help you know what to do with that feeling. For example, if it requires you to get away from them or make alternative plans, it can give you the information and courage to do that, communicating and acting as necessary.
#8 Black Obsidian
Like other black stones on this list, obsidian can help ward off negative energies, creating a divider between you and the energy vampire. That way, when someone comes to talk to you about all their problems, you’ll be there in physical form, but they won’t be able to penetrate your auric field and “steal” your energy.
Color: White, goldish
Chakra: Sacral, Heart
As you probably guessed by the same, this empath protection stone is most known for its connection to the moon and feminine energy. With that though comes a sense of calmness. This can help balance whatever negative, anxious, stressed-out energies you’ve picked up along your day. In addition to stabilizing your mood, it also encourages intuition, which can help empaths know who to steer clear of
Color: Many colors; purple, blue, red, pink, green, yellow, orange, gray, black
Chakra: Heart, Throat, Third-Eye
Fluorite is often referred to as a “psychic vacuum” so it’s understandably perfect for this list. It can help draw out negative energies, leaving behind the positive. Similar to some other stones on this list, it can help create a barrier between you and the person giving off bad vibes. It’s a good stone to keep around to keep your arura clean.
#11 Clear Quartz
Chakra: All chakras
Clear quartz can be one of the best crystals for empaths but with one caveat: you have to “program” aka ask it to protect you. Clear quartz is known as the “jack of all crystals” so to speak in that it can be used for a variety of purposes.
However, clear quartz is known to amplify the energy of whatever is around it. For example, if it’s around an energy vampire or around you when you’re feeling upset, it can actually amplify those unwanted feelings. However, if you give it a “job” of protecting you, it can do that too! Since clear quartz is probably one of the most easy stones to locate, it can be a good option for those with limited selection.
Color: Purple or pink tones
Chakra: Heart, Throat, Third Eye, Crown
Lepidolite isn’t traditionally thought of as a protection stone, but it can help protect you from your newfound energies. It can help filter out negative situations or emotions caused by others. And, it can bring a calming effect by taking on some of your stress or anxiety. In this way, it helps to balance out emotions, leaving you with your own.
Being that it’s also a third-eye and crown chakra stone, it can help you tap into “the goodness” of whatever you believe in—whether that’s God, Goddesses, the Universe, your higher-self, etc.
Color: Green, Blue, White-Grey
Chakra: Throat, Third-Eye, Crown
Labradorite is one of the best and most commonly recommended stones for protecting against negative energies. It can help block these unwanted forces, allowing you to experience only your own thoughts and emotions. It’s also associated with intuition and psychic abilities, which can be helpful in deciding who’s an energy vampire and who’s right for your circle.
How to Use Empath Protection Stones
Now that you know which are the best stones for empath protection, how do you use them? Here’s some suggestions:
- Keep a stone in your pocket when you leave the home, such as going to work or school
- Make a piece of empath jewelry, such as a pendant, bracelet or ankle
- Keep crystals around your home, perhaps in places where “energy dumping” is most likely to occur
- Use stones to help ground yourself. Hold one while you envision roots extending from the bottom of your feet deep into the earth’s crust.
- Place stones on your desk for energy vampire coworkers and bosses
- Sleep with one under your pillow if you think energy vampires are causing bad dreams
- Meditate with crystals to help calm your energy
- Set up a crystal grid to help protect against a specific narcissist or energy vampire you’re having trouble parting from (great for break ups/heartbreak).
- Use an empath protection stone during a cord-cutting visualization (below)
Summary of the Best Empath Protection Stones
Empaths are sensitive people and with that, they can accidentally pick up on other’s energies. This can lead them to feel sad, anxious, angry or a host of other negative emotions without knowing why. There are several ways to shield yourself from the effects of narcissists and energy vampires, one being empath protection stones. If you want to try it out yourself, you can carry a crystal, buy empath jewelry or make your own. The best crystals for empaths include hematite, black tourmaline, amethyst, smokey quartz, malachite, citrine, lapis lazuli, black obsidian, moonstone, fluorite, clear quartz, lepidolite and labradorite. As with any crystal, remember to cleanse them so they can maintain their healing properties!