Could repeating that you love yourself… actually make you love yourself?
That’s the main belief behind practicing affirmations.
Affirmations are positive short phrases you repeat as often as you’d like. The idea is that by saying something is true, you’ll program your mind to make it true.
On a more simple level, you may just become for familiar with a concept. For example, if you’re not used to loving yourself, repeating affirmations could help normalize it. While saying “I love myself” might be awkward at first, in time, it could help you grow more confident.
Although affirmations of self-love work for some people, they aren’t useful for everyone.
If you’re interested in trying affirmations on confidence and self-esteem, keep reading.
What Are Affirmations of Self Love?
Affirmations are short phrases used to inspire a positive change. People use affirmations for self-love, money, manifesting, and more. You can choose one affirmation or several.
Once you have your affirmation, you can repeat it with the goal of “programming” it into your mind. You can practice these statements in a number of ways:
- Writing it repeatedly
- Saying it out loud
- Saying it in your head
- Displaying it somewhere you pass by frequently, like a fridge, mirror, phone wallpaper, etc.
If the affirmation works, it should help you believe or achieve your goal. For example, when using affirmations of self-love, you may develop more self-esteem. If you’re using affirmations to attract money, hopefully, you will attract opportunities for some extra cash.
Some research has shown that affirmations can:
- Change how the body physically responds to stress
- Improve problem-solving skills in chronically stressed people
- Impact stress, anxiety, and depression levels of cardiovascular patients
Affirmations are used as a spiritual tool to help you “manifest” a goal. They’re recommended by some self-help writers as a psychological trick. However, they’re not a replacement for any expert advice or care, such as a psychologist. You should also know that the research on affirmations is mixed. As we’ll discuss below, affirmations on confidence work for some people, but not everyone.
Do Affirmations of Self Love Work?
Although many people use affirmations, they don’t work for everyone. If you want to try them, evaluate whether they work for you. If they don’t, that’s a normal experience too.
In A Liberated Mind, psychology professor Steven Hayes explains that affirmations don’t work when we’re most desperate for them. For example, if we’re feeling bad about ourselves, a positive statement could feel so fake that it makes us feel worse. For these people, affirmations would have the opposite effect they intended. On the other hand, if you’re already feeling good about yourself, affirmations could make you feel even better.
This was shown to be the case in a 2009 study. People with high self-esteem felt better after self-statements, but only to a limited degree. However, the statements backfired for those with low self-esteem.
The lesson we can learn from this research is this: Use affirmations of self-love when you’re already feeling good about yourself. If you want to try anyway, try to at least choose affirmations on confidence that feel right and relatable to you. And, positive statements don’t make you feel better, it’s okay to stop using them.
If you’re struggling with self-esteem, you should know that there’s evidence-based solutions to help you. To get started, you may consider seeing a therapist or counselor, who can develop a plan for you. Research has also shown that self-compassion exercises and targeting negative self-talk can help you feel better about yourself and your life.
How to Use Affirmations on Confidence and Self Love
Before using affirmations, first decide if they’re even right for you. If you’re feeling really bad, it might be better to wait until you mood rises to use affirmations. As the research shows, affirmations can backfire when we’re already feeling bad about a topic. Instead, use these positive statements to amp up when you’re already feeling good.
Based on research, we also know that we should choose affirmations of self-love carefully. It’s better to choose statements that we believe in or at least somewhat believe in. If our positive statement seems too far out of reach, you might feel ridiculous saying it, and end up feeling worse.
Use the affirmations of self-love in the section below for ideas. You can also edit these affirmations so they suit you. You can choose one affirmation or a few.
Once you have your affirmations selected, repeat it as often as you’d like. That could be a few times a day or a few times a week. If you want to make it a habit, pair it with another activity. For example, perhaps you say your affirmations every day when you wake up.
Affirmations of Self Love
Customize these affirmations on confidence and self-love by editing or combining them.
- I love myself
- I’m really okay with myself
- I believe in myself
- I trust in my abilities
- I trust my intuition
- I have the ability to do great things
- My work is valuable
- My work makes a different
- I am smart
- I am capable of what comes my way
- I deserve to be here
- I am beautiful
- I am worthy of what I desire
- I am blessed
- I am enough
- I’m confident in my decisions
- Each day, I get better
- I am doing my best
- I am here to make a difference
- I am here because I’m supposed to be
- I should take up space
- If an old white man can, I definitely can
- I have something unique to contribute
- Life is a miracle
- I am grateful for my life
- I feel better about myself each day
- Asking for help is strength
- I know who I can trust
- My ideas are valuable
- I have so much to contribute
- I bring joy to the room
- I’m learning how to best share my talents
- I’m learning my best talents
- I’m learning to recognize my talents
- I’m so grateful for my talents
- I am in control
- I know when it’s safe/necessary to give up control
- I can cope with this
- I have a strong backbone
- There are so many possibilities for me
- I deserve happiness
- It’s safe to stand up for myself
- I completely accept myself
- I am at peace with myself
- I have compassion for myself
- I vow to talk to myself as a friend
- I am mindful of my self-talk
- I’m leaning into myself today
- I am powerful
- I have the power to create change
- I am brave
- I’m good at what I do
- I am courageous
- I deserve to be loved
- I’m grateful for my body
- I accept my past
- I am allowed to say ‘no’
- It’s safe to ‘yes’
- I am a force of nature
- I compare myself to myself
- Every step forward counts
- I’m skilled but teachable
- I’m the chosen sperm for a reason!
- I have self-compassion for my mistakes
- I am thankful I woke up today
- I am a helpful person
- I am comfortable alone
- I am comfortable with others
- Each day, I become more myself
- I’m comfortable being me
- I say my opinions freely
- I give myself permission to be myself
- I have integrity
- I appreciate myself
- I am a magnet for everything good
- My best is the only perfect
- I can only be the best version of me
- I am a superwoman
- I create opportunity
- My efforts count
- I am resilient
- I deserve great relationships
- I respect myself
- I choose myself
- I am so proud of myself
- I deserve the good things
- What I don’t know is learnable
- I don’t control outcomes, I control my effort
- I have faith in my dreams
- I create success