8 Toxic Relationship Signs To Check Yourself For

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We’re so quick to label others as toxic but what about ourselves?

It can be difficult to be honest about problems with our behavior. When we know someone has wronged us, taking accountability for our actions can be even harder. Why should we? We’re in the right.

While our toxic traits don’t excuse another’s, admitting them to ourselves can be powerful. It opens us up to change. It makes us better partners for the next people.

Keep reading to learn 8 toxic relationship signs to check yourself for.

Table of Contents

Toxic Relationship Meaning

With the word being thrown around, what’s the real toxic relationship meaning? What are the toxic relationship signs?

The first thing to know about toxic relationships is that they’re on a spectrum. A relationship could be toxic because partners have different value they constantly argue about. It could be caused by simple communication problems a partner is unwilling to work on. On the more dangerous end, a toxic relationship could mean abuse.

A toxic relationship could be two partners who just don’t together. Or it could be one abusing the other. The spectrum is large. In any case, because toxic relationships aren’t healthy, you should consider leaving. In cases of abuse, you should consider making a safe plan to leave or calling a domestic abuse hotline to help.

Toxic Relationship Meaning: An unhealthy relationship that falls anywhere on the spectrum of unhealthy relationships.

A toxic relationship could be caused by one partner or both partners. While you commonly read the toxic relationship signs, they’re usually focused on the other person. It’s important to consider when we contribute in the toxic relationship, meaning we can accidently be toxic ourselves.

8 Signs You’re Toxic: Toxic Relationship Signs

Looking at these toxic relationship signs and ask yourself if you can relate to any. If so, try not to shame yourself. Instead, look at your actions with self-compassion and consider how you might change your behavior.

#1 Overreacting

If we’re emotional or sensitive people, we tend to take things personally. Sensitivity is a beautiful thing but it can turn into a toxic trait when we use it as an excuse to overreact.

While we might be right in our anger, blowing it up into a big situation only makes it worse. Instead of giving the other person space to find solutions or give an apology, we automatically jump to the darkest side of it.

This is called awfulizing — to think that it couldn’t be worse and can’t be solved.

Many of us awfulize in daily life. Like, we take a situation with no meaning and give it a negative one. When we repeat this thinking style over and over again in relationships, it can become toxic to the person around us.

#2 Gripping On Past Expiry Dates

This is a toxic relationship sign that many people look over. I’m willing to bet that most toxic relationships have some sort of off/on, hot/cold or good/bad dynamic.

There’s some good sprinkled in with the bad, which is why we stay and why it’s so toxic to us.

We understand the other person plays a part.

We might also ask ourselves why we’re gripping on so hard. We know the relationship is past its expiry date but we still keep holding on, hoping it will revive.

But in our truest hearts, we know it won’t. It was a dead-end from the start.

Staying despite your deeper truth can be toxic to the other person. It can give them hope that the relationship will change, even though you know it won’t.

More importantly, though, it’s toxic to yourself.

You know your own truth. But you’re rejecting yourself of it.

#3 Insulting and Swearing

It’s hard to keep calm when you know you’re in the right. But being the correct one doesn’t give you the right to treat the other poorly. Justified anger isn’t an excuse for swearing at someone. This is probably one of the most common toxic relationship signs in ourselves and other people.

Many of us do this to some extent.

If a partner doesn’t seem to be getting the point no matter what I say, it feels like my blood is about to spill out. And if he says something worse, it’s tempting to call him an idiot. I’ve learned to couch it as “idiot-like behavior.” It’s still not appropriate, helpful or right to say.

We should consider the toxicity of our words in context. For example, swearing is normal. But swearing during an argument can be aggressive, even if you’re not directing it at your partner.

Taking breaks or breathing can help stop us from saying explosive things and escalating an already toxic argument.

#4 Raising Voices

Even though I absolutely hate it when someone yells at me, I sometimes have trouble not raising my voice when I’m overly upset.

This is natural to some extent. What do you do when someone isn’t hearing you? You speak even louder.

And when they still don’t get it? You might yell.

If you’re someone who talks loudly or who has a more direct voice, sliding into your aggressive tone may be unnoticeable to you. But still, your partner can pick up on the toxic shift and the fight gets worse. Many healthy relationships have this one toxic relationship sign. It doesn’t necessarily mean your relationship is toxic. However, it means you have some work to do on expressing your anger.

#5 Withholding Affection

Some people are less affectionate than others and that’s just their personality.

If you’re never giving your partner any physical or verbal signs of affection though, that can be toxic.

Only giving compliments or words of affirmation when you’re really happy isn’t healthy.

Affection isn’t a bargaining chip you exchange when someone does exactly what you want them to.

#6 Passive Aggression

Are you one of those people who refuse to admit they’re mad yet everyone around you can still tell?

Everyone is passive-aggressive from time to time, but when it’s a pattern in your relationship, communication will break down. Giving your partner the silent treatment and refusing to talk about issues head-on will lead to failure.

Over time, passive aggression can lead to a toxic environment for both partners. You aren’t getting your needs heard because you’re refusing to voice them. And your partner is constantly confused about why you’re angry and why you take it out in various ways.

To break this toxic relationship sign and habit, we first need to be honest with ourselves. What are we really feeling? Sometimes, it can be difficult to admit if it feels vulnerable. Then, we need to have the courage to admit that truth to our partners.

When we’re honest, we take away the walls we built around the emotion and get to the center of it.

#7 Triggering Jealously

Doing things to make your partner jealous in an effort for attention is toxic.

This includes trying to test how much they care or intentionally lead other people on.

You may think you’re justified in doing it because your partner doesn’t give you affection. Or maybe you’re jealous of them and are simply just returning the favor.

Your jealousy or hurt may be justified, but that doesn’t mean it’s right to trigger your partner.

Instead, try to talk to your partner about the issue honestly. If the problem ultimately can’t be fixed, it’s better to leave and be healthy than stay and act toxic.

#8 You’re Hot and Cold

Many of us have been in on-and-off relationships. Although the other person is likely also at fault, we have to take some responsibility for having only one foot in.

If we’re fading from a relationship, stepping back instead of away is a good way to assess the situation without regrets. The problem is that we prolong this period. Our partners find out and act differently toward us. We get upset, and that starts the on-and-off cycle. We have to get real on the toxic relationship signs we’re contributing. As toxic as it is, we have to realize the role we’re playing.

By not fully being with a person, we’re confusing them and ourselves.

If we’re making someone feel loved one moment and unstable the next, it might be time to back off completely and breakup.

More Toxic Relationship Signs

To learn more about the toxic relationship signs in yourself and other people, read our other guides:

24 Signs You’re In Toxic Relationship That Won’t Change

59 Toxic Relationship Quotes For Him And Her

9 Trauma Bonding Signs To Scan Your Relationship For

Summary: Toxic Relationship Signs in Yourself

Toxic relationships can be the product of one partner. More often though, there’s a few behaviors of the other person that are helping fuel the fire. While this doesn’t excuse our partner’s behavior, it gives us room to think about our own.

If you relate to some of the toxic relationship signs on this list, me too. It doesn’t make us bad people. But it does mean we need to work on getting rid of them for good.

Deepest 10 Cards Tarot Spread Layouts: General Tarot Spread

By

YoHumanz

10 cards tarot spread, general tarot spread

Large tarot spreads are a great way to take a deep dive into your own life.

You can learn about what’s working, what’s not and what’s on its way to you. These 10 card tarot spread layouts serve as an overview on your current situation.

Choose a general tarot spread that speaks to you. Whether you want an overview of what’s ahead, a glimpse into a new beginning or to better connect with your spiritual self, you can find it here. Read on to discover three general 10 cards tarot spread layouts.

Table of Contents

How to Read 10 Cards Tarot Spread

When it comes to reading a 10 cards tarot spread layout, it can feel daunting. With so many cards and positions, there’s much to interpret in one spread.

Before delving into the meaning of each individual card, first focus on the card layout as a whole. This can help you get a general feel as well as decrease the overwhelm of a big spread. Ask yourself if you see any patterns. Are there a lot of court cards? Several cards of a certain number or suit? Is the layout majorly ma of the minor or major arcana?
Jumps Out. Are there any cards that jump out to you at first? While reading the layout in order is helpful, a card that stands out to you may also be a good place to start.
Before delving into the meaning of each card, what is your intuition saying? Pay attention to the symbols on the card. After that, if you’re still learning, check your interpretation book.
Write it Down. If you’re doing a simple 3 card layout, it’s easier to remember what you pulled. However, with a 10 cards tarot spread, it’s unlikely you’ll remember each in detail. To get the most out of your reading, record it! Write down the card name and the interpretations from your intuition, book or online reference.
Take a Photo. If you want to refer to your general tarot spread down the line, take a photo! This can serve as a visual reminder of what you pulled. This is a great idea if you want to get opinions from other friends learning tarot.

Three 10 Cards Tarot Spread Layouts: General Tarot Spread

These 10 cards tarot spread layouts will give you an overview of what’s to come. These are perfect too use whether it’s your birthday, a new year or if you just want to take inventory of your life.

Old Life & New Life: 10 Card Tarot Spread for Change

For new beginnings, better futures, transformation and hope

This 10 cards tarot spread is perfect if you’re starting a new beginning, hoping for a better future or going through a period of change. It will help you reflect on your old self and the lessons you’ve gained through life’s ups and downs. Then you’ll get a glimpse into your new self: What are the strengths you’re working with? What are your hopes? And what words of wisdom does spirit have for you?

Represents the former you. This card represents who you were in the past. This is the person you’ve shed or have begun shedding. The version of you that you’ve outgrown.
Your past challenges. In this 10 cards tarot spread for change, you’ll recap on your past challenges and experiences.
Lessons you’ve learned through past challenges. This card takes a look at the lessons you’ve learned from your trials and tribulations.
Represents the change or transformation you’re experiencing. In this general tarot spread spot, the card represents the change you’re currently going through. Is it personal transformation? Career change? A big move? Relationship loss or gain? What is leading your transformation?
A solution or perspective to consider as you move forward. As you walk forward into your new life, what should you consider? This card hints at another perspective to take or a hint to help you along the way.
Represents the best version of the “new” you. This card represents how you’ve changed into a new person. What’s different about you or your life?
Your strengths. What are the good things you have going for you currently? This card represents what’s going well in your life or your strengths as a person.
Your current hopes. This card suggests what you’re currently hoping for in your life. It can point to the major changes you’re hoping to make.
Your most likely future. This card suggests your most likely future as it stands today. Remember that everything is subject to change and nothing is set in stone.
A message from spirit. End this 10 cards tarot spread with a message from spirit about your new self. This could be a word of encouragement as you move forward into your transformation. Or it may be a piece of advice about a decision you’re making.

Bird’s Eye Overview: General Tarot Spread

If you zoomed out on your life like a bird in the clouds, what would you see? This is a great general tarot spread for the Near Years, a birthday or just to take inventory of your life moving forward. You’ll take a quick look at the past and get advice on a current challenge before delving into all areas of your life. You’ll get [predictions on your upcoming health, career, love, social and spiritual life. You’ll cap off with a message from spirit and what you can look forward to.

A lesson you’ve learned—Represents lesson you’ve recently learned or finished working through. Or a lesson you’re currently working through and will see on the other side.
Advice to overcome current challenge— Something to consider when tackling a current challenge.
Upcoming well-being, physical and mental health—A glimpse into your near health, both physical and mental health. May contain lessons on what to watch out for or how to improve health.
Upcoming career life— A glimpse into your future career life or matters involving finances. May contain words of wisdom on reaching financial or career goals.
Upcoming love life— A glimpse into your future love life and what you can do to attract or improve whatever type of love you desire.
Upcoming family or friendships— A glimpse into your social supports like family, friends and others close to you. May contain advice on how to strengthen your social circle or connections to revaluate.
Upcoming spiritual life—A look into your spiritual health and your connection to things bigger than you. Can also represent concepts like hope or trust in life.
Theme of the upcoming year— Looking forward to the next 12 months, what’s the general theme?
Something to look forward to— Something you can get excited about. Something positive like a change or something new coming your way.
Message from spirit— Something spirit wants you to hear.

11 Connection Tarot Spread

This general tarot spread is a great one to use for a gentle look into your life with your spirit guides or angels. Call on whoever you believe to help you pull the cards and interpret the meaning. You’ll learn about a primary teacher and what they’re currently helping you with. You’ll get several different types of advice, all helping you better connect with your spirit guide or angel.

Represents the spirit guide or angel you’re working with now. Learn about a spirit guide or angel who’s currently with you in your life right now.
A challenge or situation your spirit guide/angel is helping you with. This card points to the reason why that specific angel or spirit guide is with you now. Usually, they’re helping with a particular situation or life challenge,
A suggestion on how to deal with that challenge or situation. This card represents guidance from your angel or spirit guide on how to improve your situation. It can include hints on the solution or other perspectives to take.
A theme your spirit guide/angel wants you to focus on. Learn about a theme your spirit guide wants you to focus on. This can hint at a bigger lesson they’re hoping to teach you.
Are there any words of wisdom you want to give me? A simple question with big answers. Learn about what your spirit guide would tell you if they were right beside you.
A suggestion to better connect with your spirit guides. This card helps you discover how you can better connect with your spirit guide. It may be practical advice or simple words or reassurance that you’re on the right spiritual path.
Something they want you to call on them more for. You may be calling on your angel or spirit guide for something specific. But where are you not fully utilizing them? This card hints at other times you should reach out for help.
Something your spirit guide/angel wants you to look forward to. This card represents something you can get excited about in your future. What’s something good and positive coming your way?
A look into your immediate future. Let your spirit guide give you a quick glimpse into your immediate future.
Higher guidance: An actionable next step to take. The last card in this 10 cards tarot spread helps you understand what you can do next. It contains practical advice on what you can do moving forward. This may relate to your spiritual life or an area in life your spirit guide/angel is watching over.

Summary: 10 Cards Tarot Spread Layouts

10 cards tarot spread layouts can seem daunting at first. There’s so much to interpret and learn. However, 10 cards tarot spreads are useful for getting the full picture of a situation or your life as a whole. When doing a general tarot spread, try not to get overwhelmed. Take a look at the spread as a whole, then take it card by card as you interpret each. To get the most from a 10 cards tarot spread, take a photo and write it down so you can remember later.

59 Best Affirmations for Manifestation: Speed Up Your Desires Now

By

YoHumanz

What do you want? And how are you going to get it?

Affirmations for manifestation are a great tool to use when you’re trying to achieve or attract your goals.

These are short statements that you can repeat often to boost your confidence. The idea is that these statements promote positive feeling that helps you move forward to your desires.

In this article, we’re discussing why affirmations to manifest work and how to use them. Then get a jump start on your goals by choosing from our list of 59 affirmations for manifestation.

Table of Contents

This is Why Affirmations to Manifest Work

Before jumping into the best affirmations for manifestation, do they work?

To answer that, let’s first look at the benefits of affirmations according to science:

Increase self-compassion and pro-social behaviors (2014 study)
Improves problem-solving under stress (2014 study)
May help reduce the academic gap between minority and white students (2017 study)
Improves focus and helps workers avoid distraction (2019 study)

As you can see, there’s evidence that affirmations can help us in a variety of ways. If you’re looking to manifest, affirmations to manifest may help you focus on your goal and develop ideas to make it happen.

Another reason affirmation for manifestation can work is because it primes the reticular activating system (RAS). The RAS determines what we subconsciously focus on. For example, if you know you’ll need to buy a new TV, your mind will start noticing all of the TV sales, even subconsciously. Before you might have ignored all the sales, but since you intend to buy a TV, your mind starts looking subconsciously. In the same way, if we affirm we will manifest something, our mind can unconsciously scan for ways to make it happen.

Why Affirmations for Manifestation DON’T Always Work

It’s no secret that affirmations for manifestation work for some and not others. But why?

While there’s evidence that affirmations can be beneficial, there’s also studies to suggest that affirmations can be harmful. For example, one important study found that positive affirmations worked if you already had high self-esteem. But if you had lower self-esteem, positive statements made you feel worse.

From that, we can take one critical lesson: Choose affirmations that are believable to you.

For example, saying “I have a big, beautiful mansion” may cheesy and unrealistic—especially if you’re living in a tiny bachelor apartment. Repeating something so unbelievable can make you feel worse about your situation. In this case, try to reword your affirmation so that it feels right to you. In this example, “I love my living space,” might sound better. As you start to gain confidence, you can change your affirmations for manifestation to match.

Many manifestation “experts” say to start your affirmation with “I am” or “I have” only. But if those statements make you feel worse, don’t use them! Edit the statement so it feels right to you. For example, “I love my new car” or “I’m grateful for my new car” might feel better than “I have a new car.”

In summary, affirmations work better for some people than others. While some people achieve success with affirmations to manifest, others may not. The trick is to choose the right affirmations.

The #1 Rule for Affirmations to Manifest

The most important thing to do with affirmations for manifestation is to repeat them! Unlike other tasks, don’t repeat it just to get it done. Really breathe into the affirmation to manifest.

Whether you say your statement out loud, in your head or write it, make sure emotion is at the forefront. Here’s how:

Get excited about achieving what you want to manifest. Feel the excitement in your body.
Imagine you’ve already manifested your goal. What would it feel like? Focus on that.
If you’re a visual person, make “mind movies” where you live out what you want to manifest

If your affirmation for manifestation makes you unexcited or feel bad, that’s a sign it’s time to change it. Your statement should make you feel good, which will help you attract the good things you want.

How to Use Affirmations to Manifest

There’s many ways you can use affirmations to manifest. Choose a method, or a variety of methods, that feel right to you.

Repeat Out Loud or In Your Head

Repeat your affirmation to manifest out loud. You can do this a set number of times to help drill it in. For example, you can make a habit to say it 10 times every morning. Each time, make sure to pause so you really take in the emotion of the statement. Give yourself a moment to visualize what it feels like to achieve your goal.

If you don’t want to say your affirmations out loud. You can say it inside your head. For example, kill time on your commute to work by saying your manifesting affirmations inside your head.

Write Down

Another popular way to work with affirmations for manifestation is to write them down. Make a habit to write the statement down a set number of times each day. If you wish, get a dedicated manifestation journal for this purpose.

Repeat In the Mirror

Some people choose to repeat their affirmation in front of a mirror. Looking at yourself while you say something positive can be a powerful experience. It’s like speaking the future into your own eyes.

Lock Screen or Phone Wallpaper

Make your affirmation into an image. Then use it as your lock screen or phone wallpaper. That way, every time you pick up your phone, you’ll be reminded of your affirmation. Remember to take a moment to pause when you read it so you can breathe into the feeling of your goal.

Computer Wallpaper

You can also use affirmations for manifestation as your computer wallpaper. This is a great idea if you want to manifest something work-related. For example, in your office, you can use an affirmation about a new promotion or having a successful business.

Post-It Notes

People also commonly use post-it notes to write down their affirmations. You can stick these anywhere you’d like. Keeping it on the fridge means you’ll see your affirmation multiple times throughout the day. Or, posting it on a mirror can remind you to repeat your statement to yourself.

You can also keep your affirmations to manifest in specific places related to your goal. For example, if you’re trying to manifest something related to money, consider keeping your post-it note affirmation in your wallet.

59 Best Affirmations for Manifestation

Remember that the best affirmations for manifestation are the ones that feel right to you. If you see a statement you like but it doesn’t quite fit, edit it! Make it your own. Affirmations to manifest are very personal. You’ll get the best results when you focus on statements that make you feel good about your goal.

General Affirmations for Manifestation

These affirmations are appropriate no matter what your goal is! They speak to an overall better life in which your manifestations have been realized.

What I need is on its way
I have everything I need to be happy and healthy
I open my arms to receive
Every day, I receive more of the good in life
I am blessed
I deserve the good in life
I am worthy of all I desire
I’m so lucky to receive so much
The old me is psyched I ended up here
My younger self is so proud of all I’ve achieved
Every day, I keep moving forward
I am so grateful for the life I’m living
I am living life as my best self
I am so proud of myself for surpassing my goals
I am living the life of my dreams
My body is bursting with positive energy
Abundance lives inside me
I sprinkle magic on everything
Everything I touch turns to gold
I am in control of my future
I am free to create the life I want
The future is exciting
I have more than I’ll ever need
I receive abundance in unexpected ways
I have the power to create anything I want
I am a creationist
I love the person I’ve become
I have the skills I need to create what I need
I am unleashing the abundance inside me
I am grateful I can share my abundance with the world
I am a magnet for good things
I’m inspired by everything I’ve achieved
I inhale magic with every breath
I am manifesting abundance
I am aligned with the future I deserve
I work miracles for myself
I surrender to the good coming to me
I’ve turned the channel to my desires and I’m ready to watch the show
It’s all working out in my favor
Amazing things are happening behind the scenes
My inner guidance leads me toward my goals

Fill-In-The-Blank Affirmations for Manifestation

These statements can be customized according to your specific goal! Fill in the blank to make your own affirmation to manifest.

Every day, I get closer and closer to…
I am worthy of…
I am so grateful to have…
I am grateful for my…
I am grateful for my new…
I love my new…
I love that I am…
I’m so proud of myself for achieving…
Every day, I sprinkle magic on…
My spirit guides/angels/god are helping me achieve…
I am using my power to create…
My new … is on its way to me
I can feel … on its way to me
I am aligning myself to achieve…
I am so proud of myself for creating my new habit of…
I am confident I’m on my way to manifesting…
I surrender the ‘how’ of manifesting…
I trust that I will manifest…

Summary: Affirmations for Manifestation

Affirmations for manifestation can be a great tool to help you attract and achieve your goals. Pick affirmations that feel right to you. Remember to pay attention to the feeling you get when you read it. You should feel excited. You can repeat your affirmations as often as you’d like. To manifest quickly, many people add affirmations into their daily routine. Repeat your affirmations to manifest out loud, in your head or write them down. You can also post them around your home for constant reminders.

14 Best Powerful Crystals for Love and Marriage: Attraction Romance

By

YoHumanz

crystals for love attraction, crystals for love and marriage

Hoping to attract love, self-love or deepen a connection?

These crystals for love and marriage can help inspire your love life. Display them in your home, use in an altar or try them during meditation.

Together, this collection of crystals for love attraction symbolizes healthy bonds, compassion and unconditional love.

Read on to discover the 14 best crystals for love and marriage.

REMEMBER: Crystals are a fun spiritual tool. They don’t replace the advice or services of a professional. If you’re dealing with mental health issues related to love or anything else, talk to a therapist or ask your doctor about free local mental health resources. If you’re having relationship problems, relationship counseling or individual counseling use science-backed methods to improve situations.

How to Use Crystals for Love Attraction

Once you’ve chosen your favorite crystal for love attraction, how do you use them? Here are just a few suggestions.

Place In Bedroom

Place your favorite crystals for love attraction around your bedroom. Since this is the traditional area for romance, it can help you focus your energy on manifesting the right person. Display on your bedside table, windowsill or anywhere you’d like.

Keep Under Your Pillow

Choose your favorite crystals for love and marriage and stick one under your pillow. If you’re married, you can set the intention for the crystal to help you with communication or deepening romance. It might also be used to inspire manifestation of a romantic or friendship soulmate.

Keep in Your Purse, Pocket or Bra

If you’re going on a date, meeting someone new or doing something that involves love, consider carrying a crystal in your purse, pocket or bra.

Display Around Home

To add more love to your life in general, consider placing crystals for love attraction around your home. Whether on a bookshelf or coffee table, you can make it into a display using some candles and other decorative items.

Crystal Grid

If you’re trying to attract love, consider making a crystal grid. For more information on how to do that, read:

Altar

You can also set up an altar dedicated to attracting love, healing a situation, or embracing self-love. In this altar, use your favorite crystals for love along with candles, statues, incense, dried flowers and any other symbolic items.

Meditate with Crystals for Love and Marriage

Use your crystals for love and marriage during a mediation. You can place them around you as you sit or lay, or you can hold one in your hand. You can do a simple breathing mindfulness meditation or you can try a specific meditation to attract your soulmate (below):

14 Crystals for Love and Marriage

Crystals for love and marriage can help inspire a healthy love life. Whether in the romantic sense or for improving friendship and family connections, these are your top crystal choices.

#1 Rose Quartz

Rose quartz is the number one choice for crystals for love and marriage. It’s readily available and usually affordable, making it a must for a beginner’s collection. Those trying to call in love will especially appreciate rose quartz. It symbolizes all aspects of love—self-love, romantic love, friendship love, love of life and universal compassion. Rose quartz is frequently used to help attract new romantic partners or maintain a long-term relationship.

As a pink stone, it’s connected to the heart and the heart chakra. With that, it’s related to healing. Whether you’re trying to heal a romantic situation or something else entirely, rose quartz is a good stone to use.
Rose quartz is also known to have a gentle energy. In this way, it can help you have compassion for yourself throughout life’s tough journeys.

#2 Morganite

Morganite is another pink crystal that looks similar to rose quartz. Like rose quartz, it also has a gentle, loving energy. It can be used as a romance stone, or as one to help you garner more compassion.

Morganite is said to aid in helping couples develop effective communication. It’s also related to the heart chakra. Out of all the crystals for love and marriage, it’s a common one for attracting your soulmate. Many also use it to strengthen current bonds, whether in romance, friendship or family.

Crystals for love, like morganite, can be used to help you deepen your sense of self-love or self-worth. Having self-respect is critical when trying to attract love and morganite can gently guide you along that journey.

#3 Ruby

Ruby is thought to be a stone of personal power. This can be a great choice among crystals for love and marriage if you have a tendency to lose yourself. Ruby reminds you of your independence as a human being. If you’re working on having the confidence to express your needs or your true thoughts, ruby can also symbolize a powerful confidence.

Ruby is also connected to the heart chakra. Whether you need help with self-love or drawing in romantic love, it’s a good stone to try. It can also be used as a protection stone. If you’re worried about potential dates affecting your energy, ruby can be a good shielding crystal.

#4 Amethyst

Amethyst is a top choice among crystals for love for a variety of reasons. Firstly, amethyst is connected to the upper chakras. With this, it can help you connect with your higher self, spirit and divine wisdom. This advice can help you choose the right partner. If you’re married or in a relationship, it may provide the guidance you need to navigate situations or challenges.

Amethyst is also a good stone for worries. Those with love-related anxiety may also benefit from carrying a symbolism of calm. For example, if you have attachment problems or worry about how your partner sees you, amethyst is said to help calm constant thoughts.

On the other end, amethyst is a great calming, nurturing stone. This makes it a great stone if you’re searching for crystals for heartbreak.

#5 Aventurine

Aventurine is another common stone that can be used if you’re looking for crystals for love and marriage.

As a green stone, it’s often used to represent success, especially financial abundance. However, it’s green color connects it to the heart chakra. It can be used to symbolize manifesting love or deepening current bonds.

In the general sense, aventurine also represents abundance. Use this crystal to help attract love in all forms of your life.

#6 Malachite

If you’re looking for another green stone connected to the heart chakra, try malachite. The crystal is a dark green featuring magical lighter green swirls. It can be used to symbolize trust—whether trust within relationships or trusting yourself to make romantic decisions.

As a top choice for green crystals for love and marriage, malachite is also connected to the throat chakra. It can help couples who need help communicating their needs or opinions during an argument.

According to Love Is In The Earth, malachite represents fidelity and loyalty in love and friendships. It’s a good stone to use if you’ve experienced infidelity and are trying to manifest an honest partner.

#7 Moonstone

Moonstone is another gentle stone with a motherly energy. With a white, reflective energy, it represents a calm and compassionate guidance throughout your romantic journey.

In Love Is In The Earth, Melody calls moonstone the crystal of “new beginnings.” If you’re embarking on a new love beginning—especially big changes like moving in or marriage—moonstone can help ease that shift.

If love is one you’re your main wants in life, you should know that moonstone is also a stone of hope and wishing. Lean on this stone while you work on and wait for your dreams to manifest.

#8 Pink Kunzite

Kunzite in the pink color is another great option if you’re looking for crystals for love and marriage. The pale pink-lilac hue represents love, compassion and spiritual connection.

You can use the stone whether you’re looking to manifest romantic love, form friendships or gain a deeper sense of self-love. In the spiritual sense, it can also represent unconditional, universal love and trust.

Pink Kunzite can give you the confidence to bond with people, helping you form new connections. It can also help you bring kindness and empathy to situations.

#9 Rhodochrosite

Rhodochrosite is a pink and white stone, perfect to use if you’re searching for crystals for love and marriage. It can help you break down barriers that may be preventing you from getting close to someone. It can help open your heart to trust.

Melody also rhodochrosite helps remove tendencies towards denial. If you have a pattern of blaming others and are working on taking responsibility, call on this stone for inspiration.

It can also symbolize self-love and aid you in having more compassion to yourself. Rhodochrosite can be used as a healing stone too. If you still need to heal from a previous situation before moving on, use this stone to promote emotional freedom.

Rhodochrosite can be used to soothe the heart through difficult situations, like heartbreak or the end of a dating situation or friendship.

#10 Lepidolite

Lepidolite can help you tap into higher wisdoms and make better decisions in your love life. If you need guidance or clarity, it can be a good crystal to turn to.

Lepidolite is a top choice among crystals for love and marriage because it can help ease worry. If you deal with anxiety regarding your love life, lepidolite can inspire calmness and a heathier mindset.

It can also symbolize mental stability. This can be helpful if you’re experiencing turbulence in a current relationship. It might also inspire you to attract healthy relationships that support your mental well-being.

Turning the love inward, lepidolite can encourage self-love. According to Love Is In The Earth, it can bring “a child-like love and acceptance to the user.”

#11 Lapis Lazuli

Lapis lazuli is a blue stone with gold flakes. It’s connected to the throat chakra and represents communication. If you’re looking for crystals for love and marriage to help with expression, this is a good choice. Lapis can be used to symbolize effective communication of thoughts and feelings. With that, it can also be used if you’re having trouble resolving arguments.

Lapis lazuli is also connected to the higher chakras. It can symbolize wisdom for higher sources. This can help if you’re having difficulty making romantic decisions.

#12 Red Jasper

As another red stone, red jasper is another great choice if you’re trying to manifest love. It represents power, bestowing personal confidence within the relationship. It can also help you stay grounded during romantic pursuits.

Red jasper is also a great stone for sexuality. If you’re looking to enhance your relationship in the bedroom, red jasper can help you explore and give you confidence in that area. The power and sensualness of red jasper encourages us to express our sexual needs, asserting our likes and dislikes.

#13 Purpurite

Purpurite is also one of the best crystals for love if you’re looking for higher wisdom. It can help guide you through your love life or give you wisdom on a romantic decision you need to make.

According to Love Is In The Earth, purpurite can help you break free from old patterns and conditions. If there’s a pattern you keep repeating in your marriage—or a series of relationships— purpurite can be a good stone to help you say goodbye to that.

#14 Black Tourmaline

Black tourmaline may not seem like a crystal for love because it’s black, not a light-hearted pink. However, black tourmaline can be a powerful manifesting stone, especially if you’re trying to manifest love. That’s because it can help ward off negative energies.

The crystal can encourage you to pay close attention to your thoughts and to cleanse them regularly using “meditation.” Having a better mindset in this way can help you attract love in all senses. It can also help you feel more positive after a bad date where you feel your energy has been sucked.

Summary: Crystals for Love and Marriage

Crystals for love and marriage can symbolize healthy connections, whether in romance, friendship or family bonds. Try placing one under your pillow, in your pocket or using one during meditation. You can also use crystals for love attraction to help you manifest a future lover. Crystals can help us focus on the aspects we can control. It can also help us turn inward and work on ourselves while we wait to meet the right person for us. Remember, crystals are a spiritual tool. For help with your mental health in your love life, or for relationship advice, seek professional help, like counseling.

8 Empath Relationship Reminders

By

YoHumanz

Empaths can experience relationships very deeply—which can make them even more challenging.

If you’re in an empath vs narcissist dynamic, the partnership may be a toxic dead-end. Even in a healthy relationship, empaths have some challenges to work through.

Here’s some important reminders for the empath and relationships.

Table of Contents

Narcissist vs. Empath Dynamic

When it comes to the empath and relationships, one of the most common patterns involves narcissists.

What’s the difference between a narcissist vs. empath? Narcissists are thought to be the opposite of empaths. Empaths feel deeply and have a lot of empathy for others. Conversely, narcissists lack empathy and are focused on themselves. Narcissists can often fake their empathy or charm so they appear to be different people at first.

While the term “narcissist” is thrown around today, it’s a real psychological disorder. Narcissism can be looked at as a spectrum—some people rarely lack empathy meanwhile others always lack it. Those on the higher end of the narcissism spectrum may be diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder. Other signs of the disorder include:

A heightened sense of self-importance
Has fantasies about how smart or brilliant they are
Needs admiration
Sense of entitlement
Takes advantage of others

Whether romantic, friendships, family or co-workers, ask yourself if the list above seems relatable. Empaths may end up in relationships with people who are diagnosable narcissists or undiagnosable people who just rank high on the narcissism spectrum.

In any case, the empath and relationships they’re in often have contrasting traits. If you’re in an empath vs. narcissist situation, remember that you can break the bond. Don’t wait for the other person to draw boundaries or act better; it’s likely they won’t. Take control of what you can by learning about boundaries.

Empath and Relationships: Common Problems

The empath and relationships can have problems aside from the typical empath vs. narcissist drama.

Fear of Losing Independence

Empaths may fear losing their independence and alone time. Empaths are often introverts who need a great deal of alone time to relax and recover. The empath and relationships they’re in can also affect their mood. If you’re always with someone, you might worry that you’ll become overwhelmed by their energies. This is something the empath needs to work on: communicating their needs. A good partner will understand your need for space and alone time. And remember everyone’s needs are different. If you can, find a person who has a similar need for alone time.

Being Consumed by The Relationship

Empaths might also worry that their relationship will become all-consuming, taking over their life. This is a realistic concern considering how attentive empaths can be to another’s needs. It’s easier for us to bend for our partners or agree with their preferences. Remember not to lose yourself in any relationship. Assert yourself, your preferences and your needs. Take time to do things for yourself and that you enjoy outside of the relationship.

Co-Dependency

Empaths are often co-dependent. Since they’re naturally in touch with others, they’re natural co-dependents. Only when the empath does work on themselves will they free themselves of the negative aspects of co-dependency. When this happens, you’ll be able to feel to understand deeply without becoming attached to the emotions or controlling behavior.

Solving or Managing

Since empaths genuinely care, they might take too much ownership over another person’s life. This is also another trait of the co-dependent, as we discussed above. When you see a problem, you might try to solve it on the person’s behalf. Or you might try to manage their emotions or behavior. Ultimately, you’ll have to see that you have no control over another’s life. While you may help people, you can’t make them help themselves.

Poor Boundaries

Empaths and relationships are often marked by poor boundaries. This often happens in the empath vs. narcissist dynamic. However, poor boundaries can affect any relationship. An empath might be afraid to stick up for themselves. Even if they have boundaries, they may not uphold them for a number of reasons. They may see a person’s good intentions, believe their words, or simply see the best in others. These are all beautiful traits. But over-empathizing them can make us excuse other’s bad behavior

Sensitivity

Although sensitivity is a beautiful trait, it has a different set of challenges. One of those is how the empath and relationships deal with sensitivity. For example, an empath might not want to attend big, overwhelming parties. This could upset a partner who doesn’t mind loud places. Or, an empath might be hurt by sarcastic comments made by their partner. Empaths need to learn how to communicate their sensitivity’s needs and boundaries. What’s okay and what’s not okay in the relationship? They also need to find people who understand their sensitivity. Don’t spend too much time with people who make you feel bad about it.

8 Reminders: Empath and Relationships

Here are a few reminders for empaths and relationships.

Empaths transform pain into compassion. Narcissists transform pain into anger.

Remember this when you hate being an empath and wish you were heartless (you have these moments too right?). Remind yourself that you transform your pain into something beautiful that helps you understand yourself, those around you and the world at large. The narcissist you’re dealing with has managed to waste their time and do the exact opposite. They’ve spewed their pain onto the world. Empaths have done the hard and courageous thing. Keep going.

Find someone who honors your sensitivity—not just when it benefits them

How often have you met people that love your sensitivity but only when it benefits them? They love that you know their needs, are a good listener, remember special days and care in the smallest ways. But the moment your sensitivity gets in their way, they detest this trait. For example, your partner might love your intuitive attentiveness but hate that you ask them to refrain from certain hurtful jokes or comments. They might call you “too sensitive” on a regular basis. Choose people who respect your sensitivity.

Kind is Assertive, Truthful and Firm

Since empaths genuinely care about others, they often try to be the kindest they can. Although far from perfect, they think about their actions more than the average person. When they need to be assertive, they may feel they’re being unkind—especially if it causes a negative reaction. Remember that another’s negative reaction doesn’t always mean you’re being unkind. Someone may oppose your boundaries or be angry you’re not a doormat anymore. That has nothing to do with kindness.

You can care in THOUGHT but not in behaviour

If you love someone and it’s hard to let go, remember that you can create distance and still care. You can love someone in thought, but not follow it up with behavior. You can love a harmful parent, but not show up to family events where they berate you. You can care about an ex and never talk to them again.

The world needs more people who feel deeply, think deeply, love deeply.

Especially in an empath vs narcissist dynamic, you might begin to feel badly about your empath traits. Remember that everyone has challenges they need to work on. However, those also come with many blessings. The world needs more people like you.

Have a Strong Back, Soft Front, and Wild Heart – Brené Brown

Author and research Brené Brown has some good advice for everyone–especially empaths. Aim to have a soft front that helps you choose compassion and love over bitterness. Aim to have a strong back, which protects you when people inevitably pierce your soft front. Aim to have a wild heart so can love when it’s hard and have hope when it’s illogical. You can listen to Brené speak about the topic on her podcast.

Boundaries might look like loving people from afar

If you’re an empath, you might relate to loving someone even though they hurt you. While other people might hate the person and never think about them again, you might still have feelings. Know that your feelings of love aren’t a reason to return to the relationship. If someone treats you poorly and you still love them, that’s ok—just choose to love them from far. When someone repeatedly crosses a line you’ve communicated, it’s probably a sign you should love them from afar. Not everyone in your life is meant to be loved from close-up. You can love them even if they’re out of your life forever.

Empath Reminder: Stop feeling sorry for people who hurt you

Sure, people aren’t responsible for how we feel. However, people are responsible for their actions—which can influence how you feel. The fact they hurt you is their problem. You mind find excuses by reaching into their childhood or their most recent poor-me story. But don’t buy into it. If you feel sorry for someone who hurt you, you might not be able to help it. However, you can make the choice to still walk away or hold the person accountable.

Summary: Empath and Relationships

Empath and relationships can take a variety of patterns. Although the most common is the empath vs. narcissist dynamic, patterns of co-dependency and poor boundaries can be present in any relationship. Remember to assert your boundaries and that you’re always #1.

Who’s Your Next Lover? 3 Future Love Tarot Spread Layouts

By

YoHumanz

If you’re looking for answers when it comes to your love life, you’ve come to the right place.

Using a future love tarot spread helps you understand more about yourself and your love life. Look at situations in new ways and get advice on deleting old tapes. And finally, how can you meet a new romantic partner anyway?

Read the descriptions below and choose the right future love tarot spread for yourself.

REMEMBER: Tarot is a spiritual tool that can be used for self-introspection. However, it is not a replacement for professional advice or services. If you’re experiencing mental health problems, talk to a therapist or ask your doctor about free local mental health resources.

Table of Contents

Future Love Tarot Spread

Choosing a future love tarot spread can help you gain introspection on your love life. Understanding the meaning and symbolism behind cards can promote a new perspective or way of looking at a situation. In turn, this can help us move forward and onto future love.

Remember that for any future love tarot spread, the future is not set in stone. Everyone has free will, meaning that card predictions can change. So if you don’t like an outcome or something a card says, remember that you have the power to change it. Tarot can caution us of problems, helping us step over them or avoid them completely. It can also guide us on overcoming inevitable situations. Use the cards to look more deeply into situations and expand your awareness.

Time for Love Future Love Tarot Spread

When is it time for love? This future love tarot spread will help you understand all that and more. Take a trip into your love life’s past. Learn about the challenges you’ve overcome and the ones you might still be working through. Take a deep dive into your hopes, fears and sense of self-love. Finally, get tips for finding your new person or love situation. Who can you expect to meet? And what’s the most likely outcome?

Represents past love life (most recent). This card represents your most recent past love life. This could be your ex-partner or a recent fling or situationship. What was your most recent love experience?
Challenges you’ve overcome in the past. This card points to challenges you’ve overcome in your past love life. What have you worked though?
Challenges you may still be working through. Most of us have things we’re working on for ourselves and for our love life. This card represents the current challenges you might be or should be focusing on. You’ll learn whether issues like trust, self-love or control are currently affecting your ability to find a partner.
A tip from spirit on overcoming that challenge. This card will help you overcome the challenge discussed in the previous card. What can you do to work through your current challenge?
Your current hopes for your love life. What are you hoping for in your love life? This card represents the ideal situation or person you’re looking for.
Your fears about your love life. What are your current fears about your love life? This card can help you understand the limiting beliefs that are holding you back. It could help you uncover fear to work through before meeting a new person.
Your level of self-love. Before the reading wraps up, get a full look into your love life by evaluating your self-love. Do you have a healthy sense of self-worth or does it need more work? This card will help you answer those questions and look more deeply into your confidence.
When will my next love develop? This card helps you understand when you’re most likely to meet your next love. Is it in the near future or can you expect to wait awhile while you focus on other areas of life? Although we might want to rush love, be open to interpretations of this card.
Represents the person you’ll meet. This card represents the person you’ll meet or the type of situation that’s most likely.
A tip from spirit on how or where to meet that person. Where might you meet the new person? Or what will lead you to your new love situation? This card helps point you in the right direction when it’s time.
Represents lessons from new person. This card represents lessons you’ll learn from this new person or situation. You might learn this at the beginning, throughout or in the later stages of the relationship.
Represents your final outcome with that person. When you meet the new person, what will your outcome with that person be? This card represents the most likely final outcome of that future person or situation.

Lightning Love Tarot Spread

Like lightning, get a quick overview of your future love life with this future love tarot spread. Who are you most likely to meet and how will you feel about them? How do others feel about this person? Then dive into the positives and challenges of the future relationship or situation. And learn the most likely outcome at this time.

Your future love. Represents the person you’ll meet next. Who are they and what are they like? Court cards may describe physical attributes while other cards can point to the person’s traits or traits of the upcoming love situation/relationship.
How you’ll perceive your future love. What do you think about your future love? This card in the future love tarot spread helps you understand how you’re likely to perceive the person.
How others will perceive your future love. This card points to how others may perceive your future person. Does it affirm how you feel or does it differ?
The highlights of your future love. What are some of the good things that you’ll experience from this new person, relationship or situation? This card represents the joys or benefits. This may be what attracts you to the person or your favorite things about the relationship.
The challenges of your future love. What is a challenge you may have in your future love life? This could point to something you’ll need to work through as you strengthen the relationship. It could also reveal reasons for upcoming arguments or splits.
The most likely outcome of your future love. What’s the most likely outcome of your future love life?

Checkmark Love

This future love tarot spread helps you get it right. If you’re serious about finding the right person or situation for you, this is a good spread to try. It will delve into your sense of self love and amp it up by telling you something spirit loves about you. After this confidence boost, understand your current blocks in your love life. What can you do to overcome them? Then get into the spiritual side of love. What can you do to invite more of it into your life? And what advice does spirit have for you?

Your sense of self-love. Do you have a healthy sense of self-love or should you work on it? This card lets you know if you’re in need of more self-compassion. It may indicate that you need to work on your confidence before meeting someone new. It might also celebrate that your hard work has paid off and that you’re ready.
Something your angels/spirit/higher self loves about you. While we’re on the topic of self-love, what does your spirit/source/higher self/God love about you? What are you doing well and why are they proud of you? Amp up your confidence with a quick, divine boost.
Current blocks in your love life. What’s preventing you from meeting someone new? This card represents something you might need to work through to meet the right person.
Advice from spirit on overcoming that block. This card helps you understand what you can do to overcome the block discussed in the last card. What’s the actionable advice you can take to move past that challenge?
What you can do to invite more love into your life. In the general sense of love, what can you do to invite more of it into your life? Remember that love attracts love. Even if not in a romantic sense, attracting love of different types can help you attract the romantic situation you desire. This card guides you toward experiences or feelings of more love and joy.
What to consider to meet more good people. Finally, let’s get some practical advice on where you might meet someone. The second last card in this future love tarot spread points towards how you might be introduced to a new person or situation.
Something spirit wants you to know about our love life. To cap off this future love tarot spread, what’s some advice from spirit? What do your angels/spirit guides/higher self-want you to know? This could be practical advice or a general theme to focus on.

Summary: Future Love Tarot Spread

The spreads above help you learn more about your love life in the past, present and likely future. Learn about your current blockages and what you might expect to come. Choose a future love tarot spread according to what you want to learn. Read over the descriptions to decide which will promote the most self-introspection.

15 Proven Exercises for Self-Confidence: How to Build + Keep Forever

By

YoHumanz

How can you feel better about yourself?

If your self-confidence is low, it can be difficult to know where to start. Are you even worth it? (spoiler alert: you are!).

One of the best ways to build your self-confidence is to evaluate your thoughts and practice a few exercises.

In this guide, we’re sharing 15 exercises for self-confidence and how to build it.

Self-Confidence Low? Try Self Compassion Instead

If you’re reading this article, it’s probably because your self-confidence is low.

Those who’ve always had low self-esteem, may find the idea of confidence cheesy and weird. If you can relate, try to focus on self-compassion. A lot of research shows that self-compassion is more valuable than self-esteem. What’s the difference?

Let’s say something bad happened because of a mistake you made. Self-esteem asks us to rely on your value for yourself. It expects that you see yourself as a positive person. In contrast, self-compassion asks you to see yourself as a human. Like everyone else, you make mistakes and should forgive yourself for them.

Self-esteem is often rooted in competition: How do you stack up against others? Do you hold a glowing image of yourself at all times, even through struggle?

Self-compassion guides us to focus on our common humanity. Sure, you’ve made a mistake, but who hasn’t? Instead of seeing yourself as great, you can see a balanced version of yourself: You can be a wonderful person but still make mistakes or do the wrong thing.

In this way, self-compassion often feels more realistic.

Table of Contents

Why Does Self-Confidence and How to Build It Matter?

When your self-confidence is low, it doesn’t feel good. Having a balanced view of ourselves is healthy, makes us feel better and helps us thrive. But there’s many other reasons why self-confidence and how to build it are critical. Self-confidence and how to build is important because low esteem can affect us:

If we feel inferior to others, we tend to withdraw from social situations. It becomes more comfortable to be a “hermit.” While trying new things or meeting new people can help us, we lack the confidence to believe they will.
When your self-confidence is low, you may naturally back away from healthy relationships. If you don’t think you’re good enough, you might shy away from the people who love you most. Or you may assume that people think the worst about you. This can cause problems in close relationships
Work Performance. Not believing in ourselves means we’re less likely to go for good opportunities. We may settle in our work life or refuse to ask for raises or promotions. We might allow ourselves to be walked over because we’re afraid of standing up to bosses or co-workers.
Avoid Life Challenges. Although difficult, challenges are usually what allows us to grow and carry us to a better spot in life. Unfortunately, when self-confidence is low, we might not believe we can overcome the challenge. This causes us to stay in the same situations instead of growing or moving past problems.
Mental Health Challenges. Over time, if you don’t focus on your self-esteem and how to build it, it can take a toll. When it starts to affect your relationships, work life and other important areas, we might develop other problems. Negative thinking about yourself can lead to anxiety and depression. We might become anxious that people don’t like us or that we’re saying the wrong things. We might become depressed if we withdraw from others and suffer from loneliness.
Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms. Mental health issues caused by low self-esteem can lead us to develop unhealthy coping mechanisms. This may include relying on alcohol or other drugs to feel better.

15 Exercises for Self-confidence: How to Build

When you’re wondering about self-confidence and how to build it, it can be difficult to know where to start. Should you use tools, exercises, or other resources? Below are x tools for self-confidence and how to build it.

#1 Write Down Negative Beliefs

Try to become more aware about the negative beliefs you have about yourself. Examples might include:

“I’m too stupid”

“I’m ugly”

“Nobody likes me”

When you recognize a negative thought, write it down on paper or in a notes app on your phone. After you’ve collected a few, start to challenge them. What evidence do you have against your negative belief? Write it down.

For example, you might think “nobody likes me,” but is that actually true? Are there counterpoints? Maybe your father calls you weekly, your co-workers ask about life and you get text messages from your friends. Realize these points are evidence that your negative belief is untrue.

#2 Take Relationship Inventory

How we feel about ourselves can be influenced by other people. It’s not people’s job to make you feel good, but it’s their job not to make you feel worse.

If you’re taking a look at your self-confidence and how to build it, look at the people around you. Are they supporting you in the way you want to receive support? Sometimes, it doesn’t matter people’s “intentions” if they’re hurting us anyway.

Whether emotional abuse, direct insults or small digs, the things people say can drag us down. It’s hard to improve your confidence if the people around you aren’t supportive. Take an honest inventory of who’s around you. Ask yourself if they’re supportive. If not, consider ways to draw boundaries, see them less frequently or cut off the relationship altogether.

#3 Meet Supportive People

If you take relationship inventory and realize you don’t have many supportive people in your circle, set out to meet them.

This can be a catch 22 since having low confidence can make it difficult to meet people. However, you’ll need to trust that when you find “your” people, they’ll contribute in a positive way to make you feel better.

Look for people who appreciate you and support you in the ways you want.

#4 What Would You Say To a Friend?

Whenever you have negative self-talk, ask yourself what a good friend would say about you in that situation.

For example, let’s say you feel like a loser because you’re broke and having trouble finding a new job. A good friend wouldn’t call you a loser. They’d give you grace and compassion for the difficult situation you’re going through. Try to do the same for yourself.

Learn more about this self-compassion exercise

#5 Learn Boundaries

Boundaries are a practical way we exercise self-love. When someone does something inappropriate, we let them know that it’s not okay. In this, we’re practicing self-respect. We’re affirming to ourselves that we’re worth good treatment.

Read: 14 Signs Of Unhealthy Boundaries To Be Aware Of

#6 Say How You Feel

Along with boundaries, saying how you actually feel can improve our confidence.

When we have low confidence, we may tend to go along with what others say. Since we don’t think our opinion matters to others, or that we’re not worth it, we hide parts of ourselves. We might say “yes” when we mean “no.” We might say we like pineapple on pizza when we actually hate it. We might say a movie was horrible when we thought it was a good watch.

It’s hard to say how we feel sometimes, especially when we know it’s not what people want us to say. Still, we must be ourselves and say the truth. Each time we do this, we affirm to ourselves that we’re worthy of having and sharing our own thoughts and feelings.

#7 Exercise

Many people think exercise helps improve self-confidence because it leads to weight loss, making you feel better. While that may be true for some, exercise improves self-esteem for other reasons. Even if you’re in great shape, exercising can make you feel better about yourself.

One study concluded that exercise should be prompted to individuals with low self-esteem. Another study showed that those who exercised experienced a significant increase in their self-esteem, happiness and quality of life.

You don’t need to head to the gym though. Start with a walk in the park or a beginner workout video on YouTube.

#8 Write Down Positive Things People Say

Think about all the good things people have said about you. Maybe it’s a compliment from a friend or a comment from a boss. Write them down in an ongoing list. Add to it whenever someone says something good.

Whenever you’re experiencing low self-confidence, refer to your list as a mini pep talk.

Read: How to Answer a Compliment with 6 Non-Awkward Tricks

#9 List Things You’re Good At

Make a list of all the things you’re good at—no matter how big or small. It could be cooking the best chicken dinner, crafting, being a good listener or contributing through your job.

#10 List Your Accomplishments

Along with listing the things you’re good at, write down all your accomplishments. List everything from tiny to huge accomplishments. Make the list as long as you can. Reflect on it when you’re about to do something new and challenging. Remind yourself that you’ve done many hard things before, so you can do it again.

#11 Acts of Kindness

When you’re feeling bad about yourself, do an act of kindness. That could be paying for the coffee for the person behind you in a drive-through. It could be giving someone a compliment or leaving a gift card for a stranger to find. If you have more time to commit, try volunteering weekly. Doing something positive for someone else reminds you that you contribute to the world. Science agrees too. Research shows that acts of kindness can boost self-esteem.

#12 Set a Goal to Do Something New

If you’re looking at your self-esteem, self-confidence and ways to build it, set a goal. When we have low confidence, we tend to avoid doing new things because we think we’re not good enough, we’ll fail or embarrass ourselves. Unfortunately, this can be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Avoiding thing because of low confidence can make us feel even less confident.

When we try new things, we begin to reverse the cycle. We start to gain evidence that we can do challenging things. This makes us feel more prepared, helping us try even more new things, sending the spiral upwards.

Set a specific goal for yourself to do something you find challenging or “scary.” That may be:

Applying for 5 new jobs
Going to an exercise class
Attending a support group online
Asking a cashier how their day is
Attending a social event

#13 Meditation for Self-Compassion

It might seem weird to think that meditation can help self-confidence, how to build it and how to maintain it. However, over time, meditation can help us improve our mindfulness. This makes us more aware of our thoughts. When we’re in the pattern of recognizing negative thoughts, we can challenge them to improve our confidence.

Try a meditation for self-compassion.

#14 Use Affirmations

Affirmations work for some people and not others. There’s plenty of research to suggest that repeating positive statements can improve your mindset.

The trick is to use affirmations that are believable to you. If your affirmation seems unrealistic or too cheesy, it could backfire and make you feel worse.

Read: 90 Affirmations Of Self Love: Phrases To Feel More Confident Today

#15 Therapy

Therapy is a good way to learn how to build self-esteem. A therapist can look at your specific thoughts to recommend the best tools for self-confidence and how to build it. Therapies like cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) can help.

If self-confidence has caused mental health problems like anxiety or depression, seeking professional help may be necessary. Choose a therapist who you’re comfortable with. If you’re on a budget, look for professionals who work on a sliding scale.

If you can’t afford therapy, ask your doctor about free or low-cost resources in your area. Health community centers may also provide services. Some people also find help from self-help workbooks.

Summary: Tips to Boost Self-Confidence

When you’re taking a look at your self-esteem and how to build it, try a few exercises to see what works. These tips to boost self-confidence can help you feel better about yourself. Along the way, try to pay attention to your negative thoughts. When you recognize them, challenge them. If your self-confidence is low and it leads to mental health concerns, consider seeing a counselor or working through a self-help book.

14 Practical Ways to Use Crystals for Confidence

By

YoHumanz

Want to feel better about yourself?

There’s many ways you can grow your confidence. Crystals can be a fun spiritual tool to comfort you along your journey.

Which are the best confidence crystals? And how should you be using crystals for confidence?

We’ll cover all that in more in this guide.

Table of Contents

Self Confidence: How to Build It

How do you build self-confidence?

Stones are a spiritual tool—not a psychological treatment. To repair your confidence, you’ll need to look toward science-backed methods.

While crystals for confidence can help, it’s critical you do the work to improve your sense of self. Here are the top suggestions to improve your mental health and confidence:

See a counselor or therapist for personalized suggestions
Try self-compassion exercises
Make self-gratitude a habit
Surround yourself with people who genuinely love and care for you. Let go of bonds that are destroying your confidence.
Set boundaries—and assert them.
Practice basic self-care with diet, exercise, sleep and meditation
Learn how to notice and challenge negative thoughts

Choosing Crystals for Confidence

Before we get into how to use crystals for confidence, let’s help you choose the right stones.

We have a full guide on 11 crystals for self-love. In that article we suggest the following crystals for confidence:

Sunstone
Red jasper
Rose quartz
Garnet
Moonstone
Carnelian
Blue lace agate
Citrine
Tiger’s eye
Orange calcite
Amazonite

Out of all these crystals for confidence, which should you choose? Read the meaning of each of the stones above to see what you need most.

Tip: Just because a stone isn’t on this list doesn’t mean it can’t help with confidence. If something works for you, continue doing it. Try new things. Use your intuition. These are suggestions, not rules 🙂

The stone you choose should depend on which type of confidence you need. Below are a few examples.

Orange stones: Great for a general confidence boost and a good place to start
Rose quartz: Great for negative self-talk. Represents love and can help you usher in self-love.
Moonstone: Can promote gentle change with its motherly energy (sometimes change can feel scary)
Carnelian: Can help in situations that require both courage and confidence (i.e. courage to assert your boundaries)
Orange calcite: As a sacral chakra stone, it can help instill sexual or romantic confidence
Garnet: Promotes the strength and endurance you may need to continue on your confidence journey

14 Ways To Use Crystals for Confidence

Before you use any crystal, you want to make sure it’s cleansed (charging is optional- Read: How To Recharge Crystals).

Once it’s cleansed, you can start working with your crystals for confidence. You can do that in a variety of ways. Below are some suggestions on how to use crystals for confidence

#1 Hold Crystal While Saying Affirmations

Some people find affirmations helpful to build their confidence. Affirmations are short phrases you can say out loud or in your head. You can also write them down.

Choose your favourite confidence affirmation and repeat it or write it down as you hold your crystal.

#2 Display In Your Bathroom

You might think the bathroom is a weird place to put your crystals for confidence. But there’s a good reason behind it. Bathrooms are the #1 spot that makes or breaks our confidence.

The mirror reflects our appearance
The scales reflect our weight
It’s the place of self-care: Baths, facemasks, hair dryer, etc.

Placing your favorite crystal for confidence in the bathroom can help infuse it into your routine. Try sticking one on a shelf or on the counter. As you look in the mirror each morning, acknowledge your crystal. Pick it up, look at it, or say your intention inside your head.

#3 Display in Your Bedroom

The second spot that can make or break our confidence is the bedroom. Many people also have mirrors and vanity tables in that room, which can influence the way you feel about yourself.

Make your crystals for confidence a part of each day by placing one on your vanity. As you get ready in the morning, consider holding your crystal and saying a confidence affirmation in the mirror.

If you need confidence related to sexuality and sex, place the crystal by your bedside table. It can help you become more comfortable with your sexuality and feel safe with passion.

#4 Display On Your Desk

If you need more confidence when it comes to work, consider placing crystals for confidence on your desk.

If you’re afraid of people asking what they’re for, you can make them apart of a display so people won’t question it. Or stick them in an office plant and nobody will notice.

This is a great tip for people suffering from imposter syndrome. Keeping crystals for confidence on your desk can remind you that you’re great at your job. They can also serve as a loving hug for those with co-workers or bosses who nick away at confidence.

#5 Place Under Your Pillow

Try placing one of your favorite crystals for confidence underneath your pillow. This way, as you doze off into the night, you can absorb the stone’s energy. Hopefully, you’ll awaken and start the day with a renewed sense of trust in yourself.

To make it extra powerful and prime your mind, try this: Before sleep, hold your crystal in your hand and repeat a confidence affirmation. Tuck the crystal under your pillow and doze off with the last thoughts of the day being good ones.

#6 Make a Confidence Crystal Spray

A fun way to bring the energy into your daily routine is to make a spray with one of your favorite crystals for confidence.

All you need is water, a spray bottle, sunlight and your stone. Once created, you can use your confidence spray anywhere. Here’s some suggestions:

Spray on yourself every morning before leaving home
Spray in your home every day to infuse it with confidence
Spray in areas where you predict you’ll need confidence later (ex. meeting boardroom or bedroom)

Read: How To Make Spiritual Cleansing Spray: DIY Crystal Essence

#7 Make a Tincture with Crystals for Confidence

Rather than making a spray, you can use your confidence crystal to make a tincture.

Place your crystals for confidence in a bowl of water in sunlight. After a few hours, it will absorb the energy. Pour the water into a dropper bottle and use as a tincture.

Place a few drops under your tongue when you need a boost of confidence.

Learn How To Make a Gem Tincture

#8 Keep In Your Purse or Pocket

Keeping crystals for confidence on you during the day can bring comfort. Consider keeping a stone in your purse or pocket.

It may remind you of your goal to assert yourself and your boundaries. Or you can bring it out and hold it whenever you need a boost or loving whisper.

#9 Keep In Your Bra

Let’s say you’re about to give an important speech or attend a meeting. You might not be able to openly display your crystal.

In this case, it’s a good idea to keep a confidence crystal in your bra. Although it may sound weird, it’s a discreet way to carry your crystal close to your heart. (Just make sure it’s secure so it doesn’t fall out of your bra during your speech!).

#10 Keep In Your Car

If you’re an anxious driver and need to build confidence in that area, keep a crystal in your glove compartment box.

Even with no problems driving, placing a confidence crystal in your car can be symbolic. It can serve as a reminder that you’re behind the wheel of your own life—and that you have the ability to decide which direction to head in.

#11 Crystal Grid for Confidence

If you’ve collected a few crystals for confidence, consider making a crystal grid.

A crystal grid is a combination of crystals placed intentionally into a design. Each crystal grid has a set purpose or intention.

To make a crystal grid for confidence, choose your favorite stones. Then lay them out according to your intuition or according to a template. If you don’t have many crystals, you can use other “filler” stones that aren’t necessarily related to confidence. The only rule is to follow your intuition.

How you use your crystal grid is up to you. Here’s a few ideas:

It may simply serve as a reminder of your goal
Meditate nearby it to improve confidence
Say an affirmation whenever you pass by your crystal grid
Say a daily prayer for confidence over your grid

For ideas, read: 6 Crystal Grid Templates Printables For Love, Protection, Healing

#12 Make an Altar

Use your crystals for confidence as a part of a spiritual altar. An altar is an area where you place “offerings” or “gifts.” This can be a special table, slot in a bookshelf, or corner of a desk.

Make an altar specifically to honor yourself and your growing confidence. Here’s some ideas on items to build an altar for confidence:

Crystals for confidence
Specific tarot cards, angel cards or other divination cards that represent confidence
Candles
Incense
Photos that give you confidence
Notes from loved ones that give you confidence
Notes or messages to yourself to remind you of how great you are
Small statues or trinkets that represent confidence

After you’ve made your altar, remember to set your intention for it. That way, whenever you pass by the space, you’ll remember your goal of increased confidence.

#13 Journal Prompts With Crystals

Choose a journal prompt for confidence and write about it. For example, writing about the prompt “What am I really good at?” will prime your mind to think about the positives you have to offer.

While you write, place a crystal for confidence by your side. This can serve as an inspiration and amp up the passion you have for yourself.

#14 Meditation for Self-Compassion with Crystals for Confidence

Probably the best way to use crystals for confidence is to meditate with them. Not only will you get the benefits of your crystal, but you will also get the benefits of mediation.

Researcher Kristin Neff has shown that meditation is a powerful tool to increase self-compassion. Follow one of her guided meditations while holding a crystal. Alternatively, you can spread a few crystals for confidence around you while you meditate.

Not sure where to start? Try the self-compassion meditation below:

Summary: How to Use Crystals for Confidence

Once you’ve identified your favorite crystals for confidence, you can start using them. A simple way to incorporate them into your routine is to display your stones in spots where you need confidence. The bathroom, bedroom and your office are good places to start. To actively work with crystals for confidence, you can meditate with them, hold them while repeating affirmations and use them as a part of an altar or crystal grid.

DIY Crystal Bookmarks: Easy Wire Wrap Crystal Gemstone Craft

By

YoHumanz

diy witchy crafts, gemstone craft, crystal crafts, diy bookmarks, craft bookmarks

Have a few crystals? Make a mystical crystal bookmark!

This gemstone craft looks magical dangling from books and shelves. Make any space a little more spiritual with these bookmarks.

In this guide, you’ll learn 3 ways to make wire wrap crystal bookmarks: Ribbon, chain and bookmark craft hook. But first, let’s go over how to wire wrap crystal stones.

Table of Contents

How To Wire Wrap Crystal Stones

To do all of these bookmark DIYs, you’ll need to know how to wire wrap crystal. This is easy and requires only a few tools. I was intimidated to learn wire wrapping, but I found an easy method.

The guide features photo instructions and the best video I could find on wire wrapping crystals for beginners.

Ribbon Wire Wrap Crystal Bookmark: Gemstone Craft

These crystal ribbon bookmarks are easy to make and add a mystical feel to any bookshelf or room. Choose a ribbon color that goes with your crystal or décor.

Step One: Gather Supplies

For this wire wrap crystal bookmark, you’ll need:

Wire
Ribbon
Crystal
Craft jewelry chain
Ribbon end clamps
Jump rings
Scissors
Pliers
Wire cutters

Step 2: Wire Wrap Crystal + Attach to chain

Use wire to wire wrap your crystal. If you’re a beginner in how to wire wrap crystal, read our full guide.

After you’re finished wire wrapping your crystal, attach the loop to a chain using a jump ring.

Step 3: Cut Ribbon + Attach Ribbon End

Cut ribbon the desired length of your bookmark. Slide the end of the ribbon into a ribbon end clamp. Use pliers to press the clamp down, securing it. Repeat on the other side.

Step 4: Attach Crystal Chain to Ribbon End

Attach your crystal chain to one of the ribbon end clamps using a jump ring.

Print Recipe

Ribbon Wire Wrap Crystal Bookmark

Learn how to make a mystical healing gemstone craft wire wrap crystal bookmark. See the full post for instructions on how to wire wrap crystal stones.

Keyword: crafts diy, crystal crafts, diy bookmarks, witchy crafts, witchy decor diy

Equipment

Wire
Ribbon
Crystal
Craft jewelry chain
Ribbon end clamps
Jump rings
Scissors
Pliers
Wire cutters

Instructions

Wire wrap crystal: Cross two wires of the same length. Twist the middle of the wires to create a “backbone.” It should be as long as the longest flat side of your crystal. Place wire on longest part of crystal and start wrapping. When wires cross, twist them. Cover the crystal so that it won’t slip out. When finished, bring wires to the top and twist. Use twist to create a loop and tuck remaining wires in. See post get more details on how to wire wrap crystal.
Attach crystal to change: Cut your craft jewelry chain to your desired length. Attach it to your wire wrapped crystal loop using a jump ring and pliers.
Attach chain to ribbon end: Using pliers and a jump ring, attach the crystal chain to one of the ribbon end clamps.

Chain Wire Wrap Crystal Bookmark: Gemstone Craft

This wire wrap crystal craft can be used as a bookmark or displayed randomly on the shelf. It makes any corner a little more magical.

To make the most cohesive bookmark, try to match your chain and wire wrap color.

Print Recipe

Chain Wire Wrap Crystal Bookmark

This chain wire wrapped crystal is super easy and only requires a few tools. Use this gemstone craft in your bookshelf to add a spiritual touch.

Keyword: crystal crafts, diy bookmarks, GEMSTONE CRAFTS, witchy crafts, witchy decor diy, witchy diy

Equipment

Wire
Crystal
Craft jewelry chain
Jump rings
Scissors
Pliers
Wire cutters

Instructions

Wire wrap crystal: Cross two wires of the same length. Twist the middle of the wires to create a “backbone.” It should be as long as the longest flat side of your crystal. Place wire on longest part of crystal and start wrapping. When wires cross, twist them. Cover the crystal so that it won’t slip out. When finished, bring wires to the top and twist. Use twist to create a loop and tuck remaining wires in. See post get more details on how to wire wrap crystal.
Cut chain: Cut your craft jewelry chain to the desired length you want your bookmark.
Attach wire: Use pliers to open at jump ring. Put on the crystal’s loop and chain and close the jumping.

Metal Hook Bookmarks with Wire Wrap Crystal: Gemstone Craft

Craft metal hook bookmarks can be purchased online or at your local craft store. Use the hook at the end to attach your wire wrapped crystal.

To make the most cohesive gemstone craft bookmark, try to match the color of your bookmark hook to the wire wrap. I didn’t have a gold-color wire wrap, so I couldn’t. But I think it still looked pretty and rustic!

Print Recipe

Metal Hook Bookmarks with Wire Wrap Crystal

These wire wrap crystal bookmarks can be easily made using metal hook bookmarks. You can find them at your local craft store or online.

Keyword: craft bookmarks, crystal crafts, diy bookmarks, GEMSTONE CRAFTS, witchy crafts, witchy decor diy, witchy diy

Equipment

Craft metal hook bookmarks
Wire
Crystal
Jump rings
Pliers
Wire cutters

Instructions

Wire wrap crystal: Cross two wires of the same length. Twist the middle of the wires to create a “backbone.” It should be as long as the longest flat side of your crystal. Place wire on longest part of crystal and start wrapping. When wires cross, twist them. Cover the crystal so that it won’t slip out. When finished, bring wires to the top and twist. Use twist to create a loop and tuck remaining wires in. See post get more details on how to wire wrap crystal.
Attach to Metal Bookmark: Open a jump ring using pliers. Slide on the metal bookmark ring and the crystal wire loop. Close the jump ring.

Crystal Bookmarks: Wire Wrap Crystal Gemstone Craft

If you have a few crystals laying around, try to make some wire wrap crystal bookmarks! Add a ribbon for a sophisticated or Victorian flare. For a rustic touch use a metal bookmark hook. For the easiest option, simply attach your wire wrapped crystal to craft chain. To make this gemstone craft your own, experiment with different wire, chain and ribbon colors.

Get Over a Heartbreak with 4 Exercises for Hope

By

YoHumanz

Here’s a secret: I feel like I take breakups really hard.

Even when it’s not really a breakup.

A situationship ending could make me really depressed, and for an actual relationship, it’s worse. It feels like a part of my life is being ripped out. Sometimes, it feels like it physically hurts my heart too. It almost burns.

It’s hard to find anything that makes heartbreak better. Really, nothing does. I feel like I can’t get over a heartbreak.

Eventually, time just makes it hurt a little bit less and a little bit less…

I found one thing that helps me through every breakup though, no matter how hard: Hope.

Sure, we all know that hope is an option, but how do we actually feel it?

When we’re depressed and the future is gloomy, how is it possible to be hopeful? Is the answer just faking it? No.

To believe in hope, it helps to have a list of logical reasons why it should exist. That way, it’s something tangible — not some mystical concept.

I’ve gravitated to a few exercises every breakup that help me have a more positive outlook.

In this guide, I share 4 specific actions I take to get over a heartbreak.

Table of Contents

How to Get Over a Heartbreak

If you came here to get over a heartbreak, I wish I had the magic pill. Unfortunately, part of being human is experiencing loss. Whether our choice or someone else’s, a situation has ended and we’re left alone. And probably lonely.

The first step is to normalize these feelings. For example, did you know that the same brain areas that light up for physical pain light up when you look at pictures of your ex? So yeah, it’s going to be painful!

Next, try to accept your feelings, however difficult they are. Instead of trying to avoid or numb them, feel them to get through them. Accept that healing might take a while.

Come to terms with the fact you can miss someone yet not be with them. If you still love them, understand you can love someone from afar—in thought but not action.

It can be helpful to work through your devastation by having hope for the future. Of course, it’s hard to have hope if you, well, don’t have it. To learn the logical reasons why you should be hopeful, try the exercises below.

Once you’ve gone through the most treacherous first days without them, try other methods to get over a heartbreak—like putting focusing on yourself. What’s ahead for you? What fun things would you like to try? Any new hobbies you’ve been wanting to start? How would you like to grow this year?

A lot of research points to one thing that helps people better get over a heartbreak: Having a clear sense of self. When a relationship ends, you might wonder who you are without that person. Your life and schedule changes. How will you fill that time? Who are you? Having clear answers on that can help you heal, experts say.

Get Over a Heartbreak with 4 Exercises for Hope

Want to get over a heartbreak? You might need a little more hope. But not blind hope. Logical hope. Here’s a few exercises to do that.

#1 Write a List of Their Negative Qualities

Writing a list of all the bad things about your ex may seem petty, but it can help you balance out your overly positive view of them. Even if you’re the one who called it quits, you may still be pining over their positive attributes.

I do this most breakups. Even though I’m steady in my decision to leave a relationship, I’m still sad about the ending because there were some great things about him. Even though the negative thing ruined the entire relationship, I can’t stop thinking about all their positive traits—which makes it hard to get over a heartbreak.

Making a list can help you realize and reinforce that you were right for ending it. Use the notes app on your phone so that you can add a new negative quality whenever you think of one. They can be as big or small as you want. Examples:

They litter
Their breath smells
They can’t communicate well
Their political opinions are stupid
They wear sweatpants to funerals
They make mean comments
They’re too obsessed with “the hustle”
They always borrow money from me
They come over high and act angry and erratic

When you’re sad, read over your list. Face all the bad things about them.

Now, realize that without them, you’re free to meet someone who doesn’t have these qualities. You are open to having a partner with the opposite of these things.

You may not meet them anytime soon. But being available for better will always trump being stuck settling for less than you deserve.

#2 Mental Movie: Playing It Out

Not all, but many breakups are inevitable. That is, that issues are not resolvable. You are too different, have different opinions or both are unwilling to compromise over something. In other words, no matter what, it just wouldn’t have worked.

This is true for many of my past relationships. As much as we liked each other, we couldn’t make it work. Our needs, visions, lifestyles or opinions were just too different.

Still, I’m always devastated at the ending, even if I know it’s coming. It’s never any less sad. It’s tempting to get back with them when I’m thinking, “but what about just one more time, just to make sure?”

When I’m in the midst of it, I try to really hone in on the logic to get over a heartbreak. I try to suspend my feelings for just a moment. I play the situation out. In my mind, I envision growing older with them.

What does our future look like together? Is it what we both want? How can I predict being treated? How can I predict us feeling about each other?

Imagining myself at different stages of life with my ex helps me realize something: I can’t imagine it. That’s because the problems that we’re facing now, we will face down the road. Even if someone broke up with you, you can probably still point out some inevitable endings. Like, maybe they treated you poorly, couldn’t communicate, or something related to the reason for the breakup.

It might not be true for all breakups, but for many, the split would have happened eventually.

Now, armed with this logic, I realize I did something very necessary: I turned back when I realized it was a dead-end road.

I think about my options under this new light. I could have stayed, but that would mean more heartbreak later since I’d get more attached. Or, I could leave — which I did — and deal with the pain now instead of later.

The second option has another benefit too: I’m at least available to meet the person I’m suitable for.

If I’d had stayed in the relationship, I’d have no hope of meeting my person because I’d be too busy wasting time with the wrong one.

#3 Make a “Mind Soulmate”

This one is going to sound a little weird, so I hope you don’t judge me for it.

When I’m so tired of being depressed over an ex, I try to get someone else in my brain. Since I don’t want to date yet, it’s not possible. So I make someone up instead—it helps me get over a heartbreak.

When I’m sitting or laying out relaxing, I’ll envision in my mind scenes with my made-up person. It can be us cuddling, walking, talking, laughing, on vacation — anything happy. I paint the story with as much detail as I want. I make up what I want him to look like, how he’s treating me, talking to me, the kind of life we have, etc.

Remember this is your Mind Soulmate, you can make them and your life into whatever you want. Have fun with it.

After you’re done, step back and think about how that vision is impossible with your ex. Like:

My need for affection would never be met with my ex.
My ex would never speak so kindly to me.
My ex would never surprise me like I surprise him.
My ex would never dress up for a date.
My ex would never be that supportive.
We would never be able to take vacations because of my ex’s criminal record.

A partner who matches you well and a life you love is within reach. You just have to let go of the current one.

#4 Browse Dating Apps

I’m not sure what the “acceptable” amount of time is before you start dating a new person, but my sadness usually makes me surpass it.

It takes time for me to heal enough to be vulnerable again. Sometimes, an embarrassingly long time.

Even though I may not be ready to meet new people, it doesn’t mean I don’t like browsing to help get over a heartbreak. I’ll download a dating app and see what’s out there. Sometimes, I don’t even use my real information because I have no intention of talking to anyone. I just need a profile to use.

Spend some time on the app just looking at other people. Become curious about them. Learn about people. Scroll through whenever you’re feeling caught up on your ex.

This always gives me hope. Even if no one sticks out to me, it reinforces that there’s still so many single people out there (which is helpful when you feel like everyone is in a relationship except you). It alleviates some of the loneliness of heartbreak.

One caveat is to make sure not to get into a new relationship too quick! Being a serial dater makes you feel good in the moment, but it’s really just a form of running from yourself. This can lead emotional turmoil to carry onto the next partner, creating endless heartbreak. To get over a heartbreak fully, take your time before actually dating again.

More Tips on Get Over a Heartbreak with 4 Exercises for Hope

We hope the tips we’ve shared in this article help! But healing isn’t linear and doesn’t happen at the snap of your fingers. If you need more help during your breakup journey, consider our other guides on how to get over a heartbreak:

Summary: Get Over a Heartbreak

Ultimately, there’s nothing that can stop the pain of heartbreak. To get over a heartbreak, know that the aches can become more bearable with hope. As you wait for time to ease emotions, try the exercises above. They could make hope a little more within reach.